There are adoptions every day without reporters and news cameras present. These are the adoptions which are routine and have happy circumstances. When the media is present around an adoption case, it usually means there is something negative about it and therefore news for the public. This is a sad fact about adoption. When someone hears “that story about adoption on the news” it means there is a story out there which will skew the public’s mind. Instead of seeing how wonderful and simple adoptions can be, they only see the stories which are out of the norm.

The most recent adoption case in the news concerns a 7 year-old boy who was sent alone on an airplane back to Russia with a note from his American adoptive mother. She was “returning” him, as she felt she was lied to by Russian officials concerning the boy’s emotional state. She felt as if the boy was a threat to her and her family and wished to no longer be his parent.

Unrealistic Expectations

When someone agrees to adopt a child, it’s not as if they stood in line and ordered one like you do a cheeseburger at McDonald’s. There are multiple forms, background checks, in-person interviews, and training which need to be completed. In this recent story Torry Hansen, the adoptive mother, did all of this. As someone who adopted and knows lots of other adoptive parents, I can attest that it’s impossible to go through all of the preparations necessary to adopt and not be made aware of the risks. When you order that McDonald’s cheeseburger you know that you are going to receive exactly what you ordered. But children are not the same. You can’t mark a box requesting perfect health, behavior and emotional state and expect to receive it. No matter whether from birthing the child or adopting the child, there are no guarantees in life as to who will have problems or not.

The boy in the middle of this story, Justin Hansen, did not have an ideal upbringing prior to his adoption by Ms. Hansen. He had lived with his biological mother for his first 5 years of life and she reportedly was an alcoholic who abused Justin. Justin apparently also told Ms. Hansen that he was abused in the Russian orphanage he was located in prior to coming to America. I have a very difficult time imagining that Ms. Hansen did not think that this boy she was adopting could not have emotional challenges when his Russian life was surrounded in chaos.

Available Help

Once Ms. Hansen had concerns about Justin, one would assume she’d get help for him as any concerned parent would. Reports say she talked to counselors and psychologists but failed to let them talk to Justin. Her adoption agency’s social worker met with her in January and was told that all was going well. However, after January the agency claims none of their phone calls or messages to Ms. Hansen were returned. After someone adopts a child, from birth or as an older child, there is required follow-up to make sure that the family is adjusting well.

If there are concerns about the adoption, then there would be intervention by adoption professionals. Counselors, medical doctors, social workers, and others who understand the issues which arise from older child adoptions can assist. It’s possible that Justin was having issues attaching and bonding with his new adoptive family. He possibly may have been diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) and started treatment. There are multiple websites with online communities to lend support and share tips with others who are facing similar issues. If Ms. Hansen pursued any of these routes then maybe she would have discovered that her new son was complex and needed help from her in order to heal. Unfortunately her online searches were for legal advice. Supposedly, her online lawyer was the one who suggested she put Justin on a plane and return him to Russia.

If you listen to the reports by Nancy Hansen, Justin’s adoptive grandmother, you’d believe that her daughter requested a perfectly healthy boy, was lied to by Russia about Justin, lived in daily fear of him and had only one choice but to send him back where he came from. This is what makes good news for the media. In reality, Ms. Hansen had unrealistic expectations and was unable to cope with the reality of mothering a child with emotional needs. I do not doubt that she was afraid of Justin and his behavior which surfaced during the 6 months he was in America. Acceptable reactions to this would be talking to adoption professionals, the child’s pediatrician, a counselor, looking online for support groups. An unacceptable reaction is to send your child back as if he’s a McDonald’s cheeseburger with too many onions for your taste.

The Impact

Unfortunately, Ms. Hansen’s actions are impacting hundred of American families waiting to adopt from Russia. Russia is considering freezing all adoptions to America in fear that the Russian children who are being adopted internationally are not being taken care of. As of now, despite rumors of an adoption halt, adoptions are still taking place between these two countries. Currently, Russia is the third-largest international source of adoptive children to U.S. families, behind China and Ethiopia. Last year alone, nearly 1,600 Russian children were adopted in the United States. Overall, more than 60,000 Russian orphans have been successfully adopted. It would be a terrible tragedy if Ms. Hansen’s poor, uneducated decisions cast a negative shadow over all of these adoptions and prevented any future ones to occur.

This isn’t the first time Russia has had concerns with Americans adopting their orphans. In 2006, adoptions were halted so improvements could be made to pre-adoption training and post-adoption check-ups. This included a psychological exam for all prospective adoptive parents, which would have included Ms. Hansen. The reason for these changes in 2006 was because in the 1990s a total of 15 Russian children were murdered by their American adoptive parents.

Does this mean there needs to be more changes because of the Justin Hansen case? I don’t think so as this is only one case, and an extreme one at that. In 2006 the adoption freeze came to fruition after there were those 15 cases of murdered children. Those cases were still a very small percentage of all the successful adoptions from Russia. The Justin Hansen case is an individual case and therefore an even smaller percentage of the Russian adoptions.

Now What?

So what should happen in response to this case? Soon US officials will travel to Russia to discuss how to better prepare adoptive parents and how to boost chances of the adoptees succeeding in their new American adoptive families. As for Ms. Hansen, no charges have been brought upon her. Officials in Tennessee, where she lives, are unsure what legally could be done. Justin Hansen still remains in Russia and has recently been placed with a foster family there who I hope will do all they can to help with his emotional needs.

One problem associated with this case, which has no easy fix, is the negative view this puts on adoptions, particularly international ones. Ideally, for every negative story of how Ms. Hansen did not act as a responsible adoptive mother I would love to see a positive adoption story. National Public Radio (NPR) recently had one by father who adopted his daughter from Kazakhstan which I greatly appreciated.  These are the stories I’d like to read about more often. They could be in the media only to celebrate the beauty of the adoption process.

The Effects

The negative adoption stories definitely have a trickle down effect. My friend, who has adopted three times internationally, told me that she has already been asked if her children will have issues like Justin Hansen. Another mother of a child through international adoption was told by her neighbor how “lucky” she was that she didn’t have to return her child since hers was normal.

My friend, who has been mildly obsessed with following the Hansen case, also shared with me that her 5 year-old from Russia asked her a painful question the other day. “Mom, are you going to put me on a plane to Russia?” He must have overheard her on the phone discussing the case with her friends. “No!” she replied. “She was a bad mommy. You’re stuck with me forever.”

It breaks my heart that my friend had to answer that question from her sweet little boy. No child should ever have that fear enter his heart. It also breaks my heart that Ms. Hansen appeared to spend more time and effort making sure she wouldn’t get in legal trouble rather than trying to find ways to help her son. There are many resources available within the adoption community which would have helped her and Justin. It breaks my heart that there is a possibility that Ms. Hansen’s decisions may affect many loving people waiting to adopt a Russian orphan. Most of all, it breaks my heart that adoptions, particularly international ones, are currently being viewed in a negative light by the public due to the media coverage of the Hansen case.

My hope is that this case is settled quickly and productively for all of those involved. I hope to see more positive adoption stories in the media so the public can truly appreciate how beautiful and amazing adoption usually is.

What was your initial reaction to hearing about Justin Hansen being sent back to Russia?

Do you think it’s appropriate for Russia to freeze all adoptions with the US?

Danielle I. Pennel

Three Yellow Roses

www.threeyellowroses.com

This entry was posted on Monday, April 19th, 2010 at 8:43 AM and is filed under In the Adoption Process, Parenting after Adoption, Researching Adoption. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.